Controlling What We Can

Controlling things that we can’t control seems like an oxymoron, but at least for me it was something daily I tried to conquer. I know I’m not the only one. We don’t like losing our sense of control in life.

But did we ever have control? If something is out of your control, worrying is not going to bring it to your control. We don’t worry about controlling the earth’s spin because we know it’s out of our control. Then why do we torture ourselves by obsessing over things we can’t do anything about? What is the only thing it causes? Pain.

Do what you can to the best of your ability and let life follow its natural course. Maybe things could turn out better than you imagined. Things will always work themselves out. In life, things don’t always work out with ease.

Worrying is just an overactive imagination. Worrying is thinking about something that hasn’t happened yet.

I didn’t say it was easy, but it’s possible and will ultimately bring you what we most desire, peace.

Here are a few tips to help you practice patience when things aren’t in your control.

1. Focus on other areas of your life.
If one area of your life is not working as expected, it doesn’t mean that you’re doomed.
Whatever you focus on, becomes the most important thing to you in the present. So, when you focus on what you can change, this is when you feel that you have at least some control over what is happening.

Instead of remaining stuck in a worry loop, shift your focus to things that bring real benefits and spark positive emotions. Spend your energy and time on what matters most in your life. Do not give your power away to something you cannot control. In life, things don’t always work out with ease. That’s right, sometimes life is unfair, but maybe you can try to see things from a different perspective?

Here are a few tips to help you practice patience when things aren’t in your control.

2. Accept the situation.
If you have done everything in your control to achieve the desired outcome, then, for now, the best thing to do is to accept the situation as it is. It doesn’t mean you’re okay with everything, but if you think you don’t have much you can do right now, it’s best to let go.

Again, accepting a situation does not mean that you have to approve of it, rather it means that you stop resisting it.

3. Watch Your Self Talk
It’s easy to lose hope when the wait for our desired outcome seems unending.
However, imagining worst-case scenarios over and over again isn’t going to speed things up.

Pause and ask yourself if what you’re doing is helping you to solve your problems.
Are your thoughts helpful?
Or are they holding you back from moving on?

If you talk negatively to yourself such as “My life sucks, I never get what I want,” will only add to your stress and if you are like me you don’t need any more!

4. Shift Your Mindset
You’re getting anxious about something that’s going to happen in the future. Right now, there’s no point in worrying about it.

If all else fails, remember the Serenity Prayer. “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”

Love and Light,
Christa Rose

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